I should count my blessings.
"Women In Hamlet" went surprisingly well, though it didn't feel like the best performance I gave. Honest. But it made my parents and my friends very proud of me, so I really can't ask for more. Mao's boots made me feel like nothing could shake me, even if I forgot my lines. I had a lot of moral support and His blessing, because it surged right through when we stood together as a cast, praying, and asking for peace to calm us down. It was meant to be, and we can't wait to watch Wicked together!
My churchies and I have officially graduated as the J2 class of 2011. I shared a little and I was so blessed to have people open up to me about how they could relate and that they have either gone through/are still going through the same process I did. Just to be used as an instrument to reach out to the lonely for You, God, I cannot cannot cannot ask for anything more.
Also, this CNY, my mom and I haven't had any fights that involve any yelling or walking away.
I told her about how I felt about the way she treats me sometimes when I try to help, and this year she actually made the effort to speak to me nicely and to ask me to help instead of NOT asking and questioning why I'm not helping.
It's sad how people assume I don't help, I feel scorpions crawling around my lips when they thank me for helping or when they say I've 'grown up'.
But they don't know the reason as to why I don't offer a helping hand, they just don't.
It's still sad but my mom matters to me the most.
I haven't been overeating, in fact I think I've lost my cravings for a lot of new year munchies.
They look so delicious but I am so bored of them. I can't explain why, I just am.
I bought three new tops. One the shade of the bluest Japanese sky, another a portion of your dreamy tropical vacation sea (plucked by very skilled magicians and put into a silk shirt) and a classic Oxford green translucent long-sleeve complete with a loose ribbon just above the chest, as if presenting itself like it was a gift made just for me. I believe the things you own are fated to be yours, no matter how long you have it or if you may lose it along the way. So these tops discussed with the dollar bills and vouchers I had in my wallet whether or not they should stay. And my dollar bills were feeling sacrificial so they gave themselves up and my tops are, well, with me now. My green top is waiting to be ironed and I can go collect it from Johnna's room first thing in the morning. They all fit very nicely. Mao and I are working on building our personal wardrobes and looks, so I'm comfortably on track.
What makes me feel even more at home is that Mao's coming over tomorrow. Mao is enough for me, though I wish more people could make it.
So there is nothing I should feel upset about, though I did feel like a raging heap of shit before typing all this down. I guess it is good to count your blessings once in awhile. I stand by what will always remain: There are so many things to be grateful for.
Happy dong dong dong qiang new year boobs!
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